The truth about cops.

For as long as we've had police we've also had delusions about their customs and pass times. I mean really, peace bringing doughnut whores? Please! That's what they want us to think. Luckily for all of you out there still suffering from these misconceptions, I have uncovered the true story* for your benefit. Don't you feel lucky?

*Although this is a real book, the words are NOT the original text. It is meant to be amusing, so take it as entertainment and please don't go getting all butt hurt over fake books or slandering the name of police officers or other such garbage.

Kids draw the darnedest things...

I remember when I was little, my mom and dad would tell me that every drawing I did was wonderful. I knew even as a little kid that they felt like they had to say that because they were my parents, and come to think of it that is pretty much how it works. Now that im older and rather more artistically developed, I have to wonder how my parents would have reacted if I had drawn something morbid or graphic or inappropriate or unusual and come looking for approval. Im sure they would have been quite alarmed or confused, much like the parents of these young artist probably were. Here is some artwork done by kids, ranging from hilarious to just plain dark.







"The crush" huh? Still at the cooties age I guess





Somebody stuck in an elevator?





Somebody forget their anniversary





Rofllll. According to one person (out of many who have posted this picture), the kids mom worked at home depot and was supposed to be selling a shovel, but im not sure im willing to fall for that one.





Actually that means she's winning.





Look ma, I shit a ghost!
Or is it pacman nightmares?





Aw, our future generation of star trek junkies are growing up so fast





Japan stakes its claim on unhappy floating shit! That's right, it's taken already





I know why they're all so happy! Pass that joint, smiley





Vanessa, age 4, drew a lovely picture of a spoon with a Cheerio in it. That's right, a spoon with a Cheerio. I hope she didn't ask her parents to guess what it was...





This one was done by an 8 year old. Yes, EIGHT (is it just me or is that a little pathetic for 8?)
"Look mommy, I drew that white stuff daddy always sniffs off the coffee table!"
Just wait, tomorrow it'll be a hooker





By Johnny, age 5.
My what big "scissors" you have...





Uh oh, Santa will be jealous.
"Can we put it on the fridge mom??"





yay "snack" eyes!




Oh dear...





Ah the Family Feud X, signifying that daddy got the answer wrong and now is therefor either deceased or in grave danger. Normally one gets 3 wrong answers, but evidently it all depends on what number you pick in spouse roulette.
Whoa there lady, that dress is a little slutty for a family portrait, don't you think? Not very appropriate for mourning either





I spy 2 dicks, a baguette and an unusual growth.





Me too but I don't grab my sward and take it out on innocent trees. Shame on you.





Huh??





Hey, at least he has goals.





Shhhh, try to pass it off as a swing





Geez kid, easy on the leopards!

Photocrashing - An art or an annoyance?

Have you ever gotten a roll of film developed and found that your pictures didnt turn out quite as expected? Well picture this: You and several of you friends walk into walgreens to pick up the photos you took the week before on your family trip to Hawaii. You open the envelope on the spot, eager to show off the pictures of you and your family standing in front of various landmarks. First picture looks great, as does the second. The third picture looks fine apon first glance, but then something catches your eye. Over your right shoulder, a teenager with a purple mohawk and a less than subtle middle finger appears to be taking a bite out of your grandmother...
Enjoy the montage!





Jake Gyllenhaal is obviously a photocrashing master!

















I decided that this was worth adding simply because we are confused by the angry sunburned zombie woman... Sorry lady, but I think its a safe bet that you'd agree that thats not your best picture.












Ah, the classic drunk bite out of a strangers head photocrash.








Possibly one of the best examples of photocrashing EVER!





Is that Gary Coleman in a parka?





Whoa... thats a little scary...











Butt-mugging! Matthew Lillard, you've been outdone!












Is that a real person?? Looks like a wax replica...





I think it's a safe bet that the stuff in the bottle isnt apple juice.





Whaaaat.....?








One step back for the 'gangsta' comunity, one big leap forward for random white guys everywhere





"She dances like THAT??? Oh no, what have i done???"
























Even accidental photo crashing can be funny! And disturbing...












































Whoa, that is a scary kid... And that girls dress? TERRIFYING!