The Radical Antfarm

How (not) to Ditch That Bitch

2010-12-18T19:10:00.001-08:00

Raise your hand if you've ever had somebody break up with you for a ridiculous reason. Ok, hands down. Now raise your hand if the way that you were dumped was absurd. Im not talking absurd like via text message from the person while their sitting 3 seats behind you in math class on the day of homecoming, im talking more along the lines of a picture of a giraffe in place of an explanation. Now that's creative! Don't get me wrong, im not suggesting that nobody deserves a large public billboard declaring them a slimeball, because some certainly do deserve it. What I am suggesting is that not all break-ups are reasonable or make sense, some even verging on or surpassing totally ridiculous, and that this sometimes provides us (the uninvolved persons of internet anonymity) with excellent comedic material!

Although a letter may not have been the way to go (and the ending is a little harsh), I am not going to lie, I do not think that dumping somebody for their political view is out of line. Elections are VERY important, wether we like it or not, and an entire freaking country is run based on our political choices, so whats not to understand? Somebody's political views say a decent amount about who they are (yes they do, don't kid yourself), and all break up's are because of who somebody is. Had my boyfriend chosen to vote McCain, I would have been violently sick, dumped him, then gotten in the shower for 3 days straight. Anybody who would put the fate of a country in the hands of somebody like that is not cool with me.
"Limited" made me laugh. What a great way to tone-down saying that somebody is not very bright! I can think of sooo many occasions when I couldn't find the right words, and that would have been PERFECT!

Poor Brad. Didn't realize Frankfurter had his webcam on, did you? (Audience: Castles don't have webcams!) I wouldn't know how to explain that to my fiancee either!
I can't decide if I love this guy or hate him. I mean, just the fact that he even came up with this is undeniable proof that he's awesome, but even awesome people are sometimes a**holes.

I don't have much to say about this one... still to busy puzzling over 100,000,000 sparkly" trampolines"... If the handwriting weren't different i'd wonder if the infamous 2F was behind this one as well!

I wasn't previously aware that 8 year olds had jumped on the break-up-letter bandwagon... but clearly that is the case! The recipient can't have been to torn up though, after all, who would want to keep dating somebody that spells for "4or"???

The P.S. made me laugh at first, but then I had to wonder, who's dog was it? It can't have been his or no explanation would be needed, so it was either hers or they owned it together. If it was hers, that's pretty awful... unless it truly did hate her. If they owned it together, well, I can't feel sorry for anybody because she should known that it's always a really stupid idea to share ownership of an animal with a significant other (unless married). Same goes for babies, except that ownership would be the wrong term then.

Might be a little hard to read so I will do it for you... with commentary! Yay!
"-to be with. Joe loves me and I love him with the love you showed me. That is the gift I got from you...Love." Well that's real classy... Oh wait, no it's not, that right there makes you a bitch. "It never dies and will never lessen, subside or disappear. We will meet again one day in heaven and we'll love each other like there was no pause." On what planet do you live? In unfortunate reality, love certainly can die, lessen, subside and disappear. As for that meeting in heaven bit, don't even get me started! "Thank you so much for the gifts that you've given me - I thank you + God for the relationship I've been lucky enough to find because of you..." If you found it because of him, why do you feel the need to credit god? "I hope you are happy. I feel that I finally am. I love you S. monkey!" "I love you" really is not very appropriate after all that... am I right? (Deformed jellybean)"Always, Katie."
Whether sincere or secretly malicious, the whole thing was tactless.

First, any guy who is that stupid deserves whatever he gets. I don't know if this girl was more mad about the pictures in general, or indignant that the other girl was fat. I understand that both might be a slap in the face, but ultimately I think the worst part about this is that he cared so little about his girlfriend that he couldn't even bother with being discrete. I know how that feels! And guys, just in case you didn't know, it's NOT ok to keep naked or revealing pictures of your ex! Women are less likely to do so, but it's not ok for us to do that either! BTW, also not cool to look through your boyfriend/girlfriend's phone!

You know whats scary about this one? She didn't just get 1 billboard, she got AT LEAST 3! I looked around and found 3 pictures of the same message that are for sure 3 different billboards, and another picture that looks like a 4th but might just be a different angle. You know what else is scary? Somebody copied it...

If your going to go all out and get a billboard, why for fuck sake wouldn't you use it to also slander the name of the skank who messed around with your husband?

Wow.... was he serious with this? Lets pretend we're watching a movie and somebody gets this letter. Sweet romantic music begins to play at "Dear Jessica" and continues right up through "let you go". At "Darth Vader", the music dies with that old power-down effect and the audience gapes in horror at the sheer awkwardness of the situation. That's pretty much how it went down in my head as I read this.

Oh my god that's cold! After reading those all I could say for a whole minute was "Ooouucchhh!" repeatedly. That is really really harsh... I hope she did something horrible to have deserved that.

Here's a pretty amusing (but rather explicit and fake, probably) divorce letter but you'll need to view image and zoom in, sorry! Make your children leave the room if they can read...

It's pretty bad when you do your best to slander somebody in a break up letter and only end up making yourself look retarded and psychotic, and causing the reader to feel extremely relieved on the behalf of the lucky recipient who is now rid of you. The award for biggest break-up-letter fail EVER goes to the girl who wrote this next letter.

LOL, when I found this picture I right-clicked to find the image info and got this menu: Copy, Select all, Yahoo, View selection source. By accident I hovered over Yahoo, which opened another menu. This one read: Search web for, E-mail this page, IM this page, (and finally, to my extreme amusement) Translate to English. I totally cracked up at "Translate to English", because I had just been thinking Wtf? That's not even English! That is exactly what needs to be done to this letter! and this guy clearly dodged a major bullet, because not only can this girl not even form complete sentences, she appears to be a lunatic as well!

So saith the venn diagram!

2010-06-17T18:58:00.000-07:00

24 amusing venn diagrams

Perfect graphic

Run!

Nice.

Haha, awesome.

I suppose so, but where the heck did that come from??

Uh oh...

Win!

Haha, yay larry the cucumber

Can I borrow that when it's done?

The truth about cops.

2010-06-13T22:40:00.000-07:00

For as long as we've had police we've also had delusions about their customs and pass times. I mean really, peace bringing doughnut whores? Please! That's what they want us to think. Luckily for all of you out there still suffering from these misconceptions, I have uncovered the true story* for your benefit. Don't you feel lucky?

*Although this is a real book, the words are NOT the original text. It is meant to be amusing, so take it as entertainment and please don't go getting all butt hurt over fake books or slandering the name of police officers or other such garbage.

Kids draw the darnedest things...

2010-06-13T17:39:00.000-07:00

I remember when I was little, my mom and dad would tell me that every drawing I did was wonderful. I knew even as a little kid that they felt like they had to say that because they were my parents, and come to think of it that is pretty much how it works. Now that im older and rather more artistically developed, I have to wonder how my parents would have reacted if I had drawn something morbid or graphic or inappropriate or unusual and come looking for approval. Im sure they would have been quite alarmed or confused, much like the parents of these young artist probably were. Here is some artwork done by kids, ranging from hilarious to just plain dark.

"The crush" huh? Still at the cooties age I guess

Somebody stuck in an elevator?

Somebody forget their anniversary

Rofllll. According to one person (out of many who have posted this picture), the kids mom worked at home depot and was supposed to be selling a shovel, but im not sure im willing to fall for that one.

Actually that means she's winning.

Look ma, I shit a ghost!
Or is it pacman nightmares?

Aw, our future generation of star trek junkies are growing up so fast

Japan stakes its claim on unhappy floating shit! That's right, it's taken already

I know why they're all so happy! Pass that joint, smiley

Vanessa, age 4, drew a lovely picture of a spoon with a Cheerio in it. That's right, a spoon with a Cheerio. I hope she didn't ask her parents to guess what it was...

This one was done by an 8 year old. Yes, EIGHT (is it just me or is that a little pathetic for 8?)
"Look mommy, I drew that white stuff daddy always sniffs off the coffee table!"
Just wait, tomorrow it'll be a hooker

By Johnny, age 5.
My what big "scissors" you have...

Uh oh, Santa will be jealous.
"Can we put it on the fridge mom??"

yay "snack" eyes!

Oh dear...

Ah the Family Feud X, signifying that daddy got the answer wrong and now is therefor either deceased or in grave danger. Normally one gets 3 wrong answers, but evidently it all depends on what number you pick in spouse roulette.
Whoa there lady, that dress is a little slutty for a family portrait, don't you think? Not very appropriate for mourning either

I spy 2 dicks, a baguette and an unusual growth.

Me too but I don't grab my sward and take it out on innocent trees. Shame on you.

Huh??

Hey, at least he has goals.

Shhhh, try to pass it off as a swing

Geez kid, easy on the leopards!

The Uncomfortable Album

2010-06-12T01:27:00.000-07:00

Has anybody else ever found themselves browsing a music store and wondering what the hell some of the artists were thinking when they picked their cover art?? There are some seriously uncomfortable, unattractive and just plain unnecessary album covers floating around out there in case you hadn't noticed. For those of you who've never made it in to a record store like Amoeba or Rasputin (shame on you), the following may come as shock. Here are some examples of not so wall-worthy cover art!

Ha! wishful thinking with that name.

Clothes would have been an excellent call here...

I feel like he should be holding something more... villainish, like beakers of dangerous chemicals or a hairless cat.

That looks suspiciously like a bubble wrap dress...

"The wife took this photo of me in the yard with my good goin out shirt and the new stache, and well, it just screamed sexy cover art!"

The savage petticoat tribe of south africa

Gee I wonder why its only fifty cents

I think this is more of a mood killer than anything... very unromantica.

*shivers*

This could not get much more awkward! He kinda reminds me of Fez...

This is absolutely NOT what I requested!

Is that an oompah loompah on the left? And I think I know the one in the middle

And finally, an album that I actually have heard of and have a copy of, and possibly the most uncomfortable of them all...

Excellent album, but oh the visual horror! I can almost hear my retinas sizzle

Portable: Practical or preposterous?

2010-02-02T18:17:00.002-08:00

It appears that some inventors have decided that the market for portable wares is severely lacking, and therefor have taken upon themselves to make sure nobody ever has to stray far from their precious microwave, pizza oven, or toilet. I mean, what happens if I go out one day and all of the sudden an urgent need arises for a Karaoke machine?? I would feel quite the fool caught out unprepared like that, wouldn't you? Here are some unusual portable inventions. Practical or preposterous? you be the judge!

Always stop and consider before buying something portable that would normally not get carried around! When faced with products like this, always stop and ask yourself two all important questions... 1) What are the design flaws? 2) When would I use this?

Portable rooms. Ok, so "portable room" sounds potentially pretty cool, right? Right, and that's exactly how they get you. What are the design flaws? Well to start with, things that roll when you don't want them to tend get really annoying really fast. Making a bed suite or an office light enough to be portable causes a bit of a problem when you go to lean on your desk or forget and jump in to bed. Your desk wants to go forward, your rolling chain wants to go backward, and you yourself suddenly have no control in the matter. Hello, floor, i'd forgotten how hard and cold you are... The other design flaw is revealed by the second and most important question. When would I use this? That's easy. Unless you're overly fond of complications, you wouldn't. Really, where are you going to go that one of these would be practical? Unless, of course, you happen to be staying at a hotel that requires you to bring your own furniture... Or if you feel like taking a snooze at the park with all the comforts of home.

We have a crappy singing emergency on our hands, people! Seriously now, who needs this?

This is a portable manual bread toaster, complete with animated graphics to indicate how toasted the bread gets. Here's an idea, eat toast at home and have something else while your out and about! II think it's a pretty safe bet that this thing browns the very outside of the bread and that's about it. I don't know about you guys, but I think I can live without mobile toast.

Now that's kinda cool, I might actually come up with an reason to use that.

Hmmm. Yes? No? Personally I think i'll just stick with microwaving things at home...

This would be quite handy if you happened not to have electricity.

There's a reason so many Americans are getting fat, and its called the portable pizza oven. Seriously? You cant wait until you get home to have your pizza?

Um, NO. This is a serious fail by Japan based Niban Too Corporation. As the leading contributor to the dumb inventions industry one would think Japan would have learned a great deal by now from all those mistakes. Normally one would be right, but the obviously the concept of learning from your fails does not exist over there. Maybe you guys are cool with literally carrying shit around in your briefcase, but the rest of us don't do that.

Portable espresso maker. Uhh, STARBUCKS! Ok, to be fair this would be great for camping, but it would totally make my day to see some dumbass driving down the road trying to make espresso in the car.

Toilet car seat. Dude, what?? If I had a car there would be a few concrete rules, the first being: keep it in your pants and DON'T PISS IN THE FUCKING CAR!

Portable bathtub. We've been living for hundreds of years without carrying our bathtubs around, why change that?

No. Try again.

Kitty Catastrophies

2010-01-01T23:03:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the extensive blogging of a man living in what he has dubbed "Hello Kitty Hell" (his wife collects literally anything and everything featuring Hello Kitty), the internet community (and some day the world) can be made aware of the extent of this vile plague that has been sweeping the world uncountered for entirely to long (thanks a lot, Japan). I have yet to come across a single person who can present even so much as one good reason for the popularity of this simplistic oval headed cat. Being targeted at teenagers, as opposed to toddlers, one might expect the creators to have employed at least a slightly higher level of complexity and detail when developing this smash hit character. Hello Kitty (the alias she adopted while on the run after the gruesome murder of her then arch nemesis, Goodbye Catnip (jk)), who's real name is "Kitty White" (is it just me or does that sound vaguely like a bad porn star name?), lives with her equally uncreativly named family (rivaled perhaps only by the Berenstain Bears), which consists of her parents George and Mary White, and twin sister Mimmy White. Thirty six and still living at home... is it just me or does that not exactly scream role model?

All said and out of the way, I now bring you 25 Hello Kitty products that SHOULD NOT EXIST!

#1) Such as inked Punisher style on to your body for life...

#2) Or on far from people shaped jeans.

#3) Hello Kitty Ferrari O_o It should be a crime to to ruin such an gorgeous car.

#4) Hello Kitty beehive. Yes, those words did just come straight from my keyboard, and I am shocked and yet oddly fascinated in a train wreck sort of way... (if i were a bee living in that hive, I would have to arrange to be obliterated by a train wreck)

#5) Hello Kitty Taser. Because there are lots of shady potential attackers out there who really want her..... debit card. (what did you think I was gonna say?)

#6) Hello Kitty debit card. Some poor guy's wife's twisted idea of cute...

#7) Hello Kitty Sid Vicious mural. Who's idea was this???

#8) Hello Kitty barqa. Seriously? I say no wonder the middle east is pissed at us!

#9) Hello Kitty Lois Vuitton bong. That is wrong on so many levels!

#10) Hello Kitty arm band. This one has to be accompanied by a bit of an explanation (followed by inevitable shock/incredulity, and possibly a google search or two to confirm that im not bullshitting you). The Thailand police department has come up with what may just be the cruelest possible method of keeping their officers in line and up to scratch (bet you anything it works!). If an officer does not live up to the job standards expected of them (which cant possibly be to high, considering what goes on in Thailand), they are made to wear one of these on duty.

#11) Wow, im not sure I even have words for this one. Hello Kitty briefs... Girls, DO NOT buy these (or anything similar) for your husband/boyfriend (or anybody else for that matter). No man deserves this kind of twisted torture and humiliation.

#12) Where else does Hello Kitty not belong? In deep space, plastered on our favorite villains... Everybody likes to change their look from time to time, but there are certain limits that just shouldn't be pushed... ever.

#13) As if Hello Kitty condoms (disguised as lollipops) alone are not enough of a horror, there are matching condom keepers to put them in...

#14) This, my dear horrified readers, is unfortunately exactly what it looks like. A place to use those Hello Kitty condoms. As if Japanese "love hotels" aren't creepy enough already, this one has its very own Hello Kitty S & M room. A few words of advice for boyfriends/husbands(/slaves?) of Hello Kitty fanatics... if your wife or girlfriend suggests a trip to Japan, pack a bag, and RUN FOR THE FUCKING HILLS! My deepest sympathy to those who don't escape in time...

#15) If your dog happens to have hip dysplasia, do the poor thing a favor and don't even consider getting it a Hello Kitty hip dysplasia brace. Not only would this increase its suffering, it may also bring on horrible revenge that has probably been coming to you for a long time if you would even think of such a thing...

#16) Hello Kitty lawn mower... oh so wrong.

#17) Hello Kitty ink is bad enough... but cutting her likeness in to (or should that be "out of"?) your skin, with the intent to scar the image on to your leg (irreversibly, short of removal of the maimed leg in question).... well, lets just say im scarred for life as well.

#18) Everybody knows that Hello Kitty loves her guns. Here are just 3 of the ones available to fanatics (is it just me or should these people not be allowed weapons??). Hello Kitty Sig Sauer p226, AR-15 assault rifle, and AK-47. Hey Blake, I totally know what I would get you for your next birthday, if you weren't such a good shot...

#19) Hello Kitty welding mask, for that special welder in your life that hasn't suffered enough...

#20) I am thoroughly ashamed to be counted as one of todays youth when they now feel the need to tag walls with Hello Kitty. I am a firm believer in graffiti as an art form (although I do not do it myself), but if I saw somebody doing this there might just be an immediate confiscation of their spray paint (by force, if need be), followed by the loud delivery of a piece of my mind, accompanied by the appropriate expletives... ok maybe not, but I would be glaring daggers for sure.

#21) 18k gold Hello Kitty cell phone charm, costing $462, and the sanity of whoever gets pushed in to buying this for someone.

#22) Hello Kitty portable body fat meter, because if a cartoon feline telling you your fat wont make you drop that burger and hop on a treadmill, nothing will.

#23) Just when I thought it couldn't get any more disturbing, I must bring you the Hello Kitty Honda NSR motorcycle. Sometimes a vehicle looks better totaled...

#24) A Hello Kitty marriage certificate, to make a Hello Kitty wedding legit. What significant other in their right mind would submit to such horror?? This guy is obviously (it has to be said, everybody together now...) "pussy whipped"!

~~~~~~Congrats, you made it this far, now its grand finale time!~~~~~~~

#25) Last but by no means least, and probably the most horrifying... Hello Kitty cocaine (in case it's not totally obvious). On April 13th 2008 when Guatemalan anti-narcotics officers confiscated 1.2 tons of cocaine destined for Mexico, what they expected and what they found were surely two entirely different things.
Hello Kitty OD, taken to a whole new level. Perhaps this explains why she doesn't need a mouth, because it's nothing so innocent as powdered sugar on that "cute" little nose.

Perplexing Portraits - Awkward! #2

2009-12-24T22:48:00.000-08:00

Just... wow. The things some people think of... Family photo fails!

Um, ok, im just gonna come right out and say it, wtf is wrong with these people?

Wow, what the hell Santa??

Yikes... No wonder the dog appears to be looking for the best escape rout

How did they manage so many fails in one picture?? Lets all count them shall we? Everybody together now... 1) Bad sweater choice/possible laundry mix up, 2) Huge bow on the dog, 3) (ugly) Boots in place of Christmas stockings, 4) Gramps and botox barbie kidnapped the kid from A Christmas Story.

Those gingers have a dark side

Way to go on completely covering the tree... I wonder if they'd consider standing behind it next year. Please PLEASE tell me this was just a case of playing dress up gone horribly wrong!!

What the fuck??? "Ok you guys, family photo time! Everybody get naked, grab your leaf, and head outside!"

Lolll, look at the kid! Thats a playa in the making right there people

Don't worry, he wont remember any of this in the morning. The photographer however... scarred for life.

Im guessing the post office lost her letter to Santa?

Where does one acquire baby sized chain-mail anyway??

"Where's mah money, bitch?" Look at the kid second from the left though, is that a future member of another bad Disney channel boy band in the making or what??

We know what to do if we have ghost problems, but there's nobody in the world we can call to make this picture less awkward!

WTF????

Oops, candid shot!

Um, couldn't agree on the props huh?

Reality Check

2009-12-10T21:43:00.000-08:00

haha, win!

Creative Currency

2009-11-11T22:35:00.000-08:00

Props to the many masters of money modification, the talented Joe D in particular, for bringing us art and then buying lunch with it.

Somehow this is one of my favorites

Sometimes it doesnt take much!

Oh dear, Frank is looking a little off color! And it looks like that bullet did more lasting damage than they lead us all to believe...

yikes

George Washington pittys the fool!

IT'S PEANUT BUTTER J-... Washington??

Lincoln log!

Nobody understands goth jackson

It's all in the name?

2009-08-21T20:58:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen a product with a name that made you go "what the hell?"? I find that the best place to locate such products are any isle of any Asian store. Lost in translation or just plain bad decisions?

>>>NOTE, ODDEE PICTURES HAVE NOT BEEN SHOWING UP FOR THE MOST PART LATELY, IT IS NOT YOUR COMPUTER<<<

A popular soda from Ghana

A diet cando from the 80's. Yes, that is pronounced "AIDS". Oops!

Chips from Finland. "megapussi", which means "mega bag", is not actually the product name.

A bug repellent from Australia, ironicly used by the armed forces.

A drink from New Zealand

Dinner rolls. The odd thing about this one is that "jussi" does not mean anything, but it is a quite popular Finnish masculine name. I looked up the meaning of the name "Jussi" and found only that it is a Finnish version of "John". There are at least 11 Finnish versions of "John", and seeing as the name "John" means "the lord is gracious", I think that can be ruled out as the meaning of "jussi". Therefor, this is an example of a BAD DECISION.

"Can I get some Jussipussi to go with my cock soup please??"

The other flavors are chocolate, strawberry, and melon.

Tea

A product im sure everybody as seen, as it is sold all over the place.

Award for the most unfortunate bread name?

Hobo Humor part 2!

2009-08-18T23:18:00.000-07:00

More funny hobo signs!

Just after rumors of lohan being pregnant)

Translation :

"We, at least, are honest
- For spliff and sweets
- For wine and beer
- For cigarettes"

An Epic Adventure

2009-08-18T15:23:00.000-07:00

The awesome journey of two guys who wandered around Moscow in costume as Pacman and Jellyfish, purely for the sake of exploration (and possibly shock value).

Baffling Books

2009-08-18T14:17:00.000-07:00

A collection of books with odd titles and topics. Just goes to show anybody can write a book. No conventional ideas? No problem!

*giggles*

Omg, I want this book! Seriously, i'd read that O_o

In this book you'll find the original story of Pride And Prejudice by Jane Austen, plus bone crunching zombie action.

No, that is not a typo, and the content is as advertised.

This one is titled "Fuckin' Concrete Contemporary Abstract Algebra Introduction"...

"If you have ever wondered what action to take to keep clear of a fast moving ship, this book will remove the doubt."

This book is meant to teach children to recognize animals by their butts, before turning the page to see the whole animal. We arent making children smarter with all these "educational" shows, computer games, movies, toys, and books... we're just making them weirder!

A book of Italian gestures, the phrases and words they represent, and the English translations.

Now here's a creepy one. "
Thirteen weeks of challenging and inspiring readings encourage young people to apply the power of their faith and value in Christ to the issues facing them at school, at work, with friends and family."

I must read this book!

O_o

Including chapters such as "How To Eat With Your Pussy", "Nursing a Sick Pussy" and of course "Exercising Your Pussy" (seriously)

Something About Statues

2009-08-18T13:13:00.001-07:00

Ok, we're going to do things a little differently today. I'm going to let you figure out the topic. What do all these statues have in common?

So, what do they all have in common?
They're human. Thats right, real live people in costume and paint, at the Living Statue Contest in Sochi, Russia.

Bonus picture!

Unicorn suit and a plunger? I cant help but wonder what they were going for here... Props for originality? (and unicorn suits, but thats a given)

Stalling For Time- The writing's on the stall 2!

2009-08-09T22:56:00.000-07:00

Ah, graffiti, one of my favorite subjects. graffiti. The variety of things people feel the need to scrawl on walls, in this case specifically bathroom walls, simply baffles me. Why? Because so often makes me stop and say "huh??". Those what the heck? and LOL! kind of moments are the little things that make my world go round. Some of the most random and interesting text graffiti can be found in bathrroms, therefor it deserves a category all of its own.

I recently found this picture by accident, and of course it prompted a second installment of Stalling For Time =)

LOLL, its true though.

Loll

Thiman building, UCSC, Santa Cruz, Cali (yay Santa Cruz! I will go there soon damnit.)

Thats right, its bonus picture time! I think I figured out why so much bathroom graffiti makes little sense!

Subway Strangeness

2009-08-06T02:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, here's a random topic for you guys; the Moscow subway. Here is a collection of funny/interesting photo's of people in the subway and the station in Moscow, Russia.

Woman in her late thirties, trying to look like a teenager. iiineresting

Thats a cop

So is that

Mad Modifications

2009-08-05T13:07:00.000-07:00

I think we can all agree that people do some interesting things to their bodies. Wether for personal preference or cultural conformity, I cant say I understand all of it, but it sure is fascinating!

Scarification. To much pain for my liking, but one of the body mods I can understand getting.

Foot Binding. An ancient practice of some Chinese, banned (but still sometimes practiced) 1,000 years after origination. Effing insane.

Thats repulsive as hell, but I guess everybody needs a hobby...

I adore tattoos, but my personal preference stops far short of full body stripes.

Transdermal implants. Im torn on this subject, as on one hand I find this particular kind very unapplealing, but on the other hand, I've seen ones that are quite cool.

*Hides*

World famous Cathie Jung has (a death wish) gradually bound her waist down to an astonishing 15 inches. She does not seem to mind that binding is not only very unattractive, but very unhealthy.

Eyeball tattooing. This man evidently got tired of hearing about the "whites" of his eyes... so he had them turned blue.

"My life ambition of having a hole in my leg has been acheived! ...Now what?"
Whats with the filthy towel?

"Things that look dumb as hell for $500, Bob"

Ronald McDonald got angsty.

*giggles*

Lip plates. A cultural practice in Ethiopia by the women of the Mursi. These plates are made out of clay or wood, and crafted by the women who wear them. The meaning behind them is desputed, but the most popular claim is that the size of the plate indicated the size of the womans dowry. I have found, however, that this claim has been denied by a number of people who have lived with and studied these tribes and their culture.

Neck coils. This is a practice by the Kayan women (from 5yo onward) of Mayanmar, nicknamed "Giraffe Women." The longer the neck, the more beautiful the woman is considered.

Skull binding. Yikes!

Phony Photos

2009-08-01T23:51:00.000-07:00

Funny photoshop mistakes!

Lolll, i like how the before pictures is the badly photoshopped one

Yeah right, she wishes she were that skinny!

"Um, is our model having a stroke?"
"No, she's half stoned, now get me my pills."

Lol! Whole grain cereal, turning people white for over 50 years! It's like the airheads commercial where the indian kid magically turns into a white kid...

Sports Illustrated effed up, lol

Stop examining the blur, guys, shes missing half a finger.

Ouch o_O

It's the new trend... sunglasses that go into your ears! (is it just me or is that one of the most unattractive models EVER???)

"Spider-Man, Spider-Man ♫
Does whatever a spider can ♪
Has no bones ♫
In his arms ♪
That's cos he is made of lard ♫♫"

Lets play human mix and mach! *sings "two of these people are not like the others..." does a dance*

A story in People's Daily bitching about to many pigeons. Has anybody told them that that wouldn't be a problem if they just stopped going crazy with the copy & paste??? You have to be really hard up for stories when you start making up pigeons.

Legs=WTF??

At least the world has 1 honest diet ad

Missed any spots lately?

Riding a bike is so much more comfortable when you just leave out the back half. It feels just like sitting on air!

Can you spot the file folder? Snuf sure did!

One knee seems to have become very curved, while the other is obviously on its way to hide in her boot.

Oh, hold on, i'll just reach right trough the door and hit the lock button... I love how the little girl looks so freaked, lol

What were they even going for here?

Record number of bad modifications in one pic. Nice going, losers!

Wow... Feeling they needed to add in a black guy is one thing, but couldnt they have found someone who looked a little less crazed?

Her friends call her Stumpy
.

Damnit, Thing! I thought i told you to stay in the purse!

Oh dear...

Misspelled Miscellanea

2009-08-01T22:32:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have one of those moments where you just cant remember how to spell something that you've spelled a million times?? Yeah, I hate when that happens.... to me that is!

Well on one hand that doesnt come across as very friendly... On the other hand it is kinda annoying when people come to america and refuse to learn english =/

Took me a sec to notice BOTH are misspelled. Evidently the dream wasnt education...

We put the COOL in SHCOOL, kids!

At least it wasnt "Suckcess"

*giggles*

Lmao, now thats funny!

Irony at work

Monster cheese!

Somebody's from Boston! lollll

Not only is the chef a baby, Chinese became Chinise and the U in Peruano looks alot like a V.... O_o

A single sandwich that is both hot and cold, to go with your coffee "cigarrettes".

Marketing Madness!

2009-07-31T20:24:00.000-07:00

Not quite mainstream marketing, awesome ads in unlikely places!

A new and crative (and a little bit creepy) way to advertise pasta.

A conditioner ad in Bangkok.

Awesome, but what the hell does it have to do with Fedex Kinko's?

Apparently Folgers wants you to look at sewer covers and want coffee...?

I applaud Nationwide Insurance and Coops Paints on an ad well collaborated!

Amusing Mini Cooper(s suck) ad in Zurich, Switzerland.

This ad was placed in a swimming pool in India by Ogilvy & Mather Mumbai ad agency . The ad is for HSBC, and intended to raise awareness of global warming.

Ad for a job recruiting company in Berlin, Germany.

Knife company, of course.

Oh dear

In a coffee house in Japan. If its all the same to you, when I get around to trying skiing i'll do it standing, and with my pants up.

ESPN. "Soccer is good everywhere, but it is much better on ESPN channels."

Natan Jewelry Shop, Sao Paulo, Brazil.

Axe ("Turn the nice girls dirty.") placed these stickers in mens bathrooms in Monevideo, Uruguay.

Mini Cooper ad.

Terrible Tattoos

2009-07-31T17:01:00.000-07:00

What can I say besides, these tattoos (along with their wearers and artists) FAIL!

Its painfully obvious that this was not drawn out ahead of time.

Im guessing the intended design would have looked pretty stupid too

This is my panther, I call him Mr. Squishy.

ATTENTION: NEVER LET YOUR 4 YEAR OLD DESIGN YOUR INK!

Oops

?????????

Stay very still... it's the rare one eyed pig cobra!!!

Say no to crack! And little badly done cupids

Head=fine, body=fail!

Priceless Misplacements

2009-07-31T15:34:00.000-07:00

Here I have compiled an awesome assortment of ad placements gone wrong. Unfortunate, unusual, suggestive or just plain funny, its time for priceless misplacements! (sorry for any picture repeated from other posts!)

Mmm, yummy trashcan!

The ad says "If you don't have GIO Third Party property insurance , we suggest you don't hit this bus"

Kitty wants a hug... This looks like a job for.... GIANT EXTRA OBNOXIOUS JESUS MURAL!

John you see this? Id say you should cut back but then you'd just be miserable >.< First I thought of you, and then immediately realized that your probly sitting outside starbucks as im typing this O_o (3:59pm)

This one is for Krys and Barry<3 style="width: 425px; height: 406px;" src="http://63.134.213.17/_media/imgs/articles/a100_a9x.jpg">

The article on this german newspaper deals with the suffering of the gypsies in the nazi concentration camps like Auschwitz where thousands of them were murdered with poison gas. The unfortunate ad promotes natural gas ("Eon provides the gas for tomorrow already today").

Failure Is Fantastic!

2009-07-30T20:49:00.000-07:00

Sometimes failure can be a good thing, especially when its making as laugh, or just stare confusedly.

If you care about your lawn enough to bike-mow it, why park on it???

Lolll! "What were you helping me do again? Right! Working on my memory. Hey... I remembered!"

Just try not to get crumbs in the bed

Well damn, shouldnt you have a black SUV with heavily tinted windows or something then?

WTF?????

The truck next to it failed too

Slut only $6.25? And what an odd assortment of things to order to a hotel room O_o Wheres the chocolate syrup and whe whipped cream?

O_o

Say what now?

I've always said some people shouldnt have kids

LMAO! "Earthquaaake! Quick, stand by a window!"

...good to know?

Lolll, priceless. Not only is the ad on the wrong side of the window, apparently they think ppl need a picture of the car, reguardless of the fact that its on the car itself

LMFAO!

Ohh damn, lol, that sucks

Wow... that cant have been an accident

Japan, the fail capital of the world

Piculiar Poodles - Canine Or Canvas?

2009-07-24T13:07:00.000-07:00

Out of all the dog breeds, I think i'd argue for poodles being the breed of the most possibilities when it comes to grooming. I coulnt bring myself to do this to a dog, especially not my own mini poodle, but some poodle owners seem to think their dogs dignity is a small price to pay. Many of these are the same dog, a standard poodle named Cindy. Her owner swears she enjoys these shows, and honestly, knowing poodles and dogs in general, im sure she really does. Brace yourself....

Teenage Mutant Ninja.... Poodle?

Love the lavender poodle fro

Cocklepoodledoo?

Looks like she did that drunk if you ask me...

Ok that i might do, but id probly go punk/goth with it

*Giggles* Fuckyeah....

This woman has a problem...

Thats different....

Woot

Lmao, look at the nest

Omg i love it, lol

Somebody has a peacock fetish

(Not a poodle)

Perplexing Portraits - Awkward!

2009-07-18T02:58:00.000-07:00

I myself have never actually had a "family portrait". I thought people just went to sears for family/individual portraits, but boy was i wrong... Something my sister mention about a site with uncomfortable family portraits made me curious as to just what people come up with. Lets just say i was rather perplexed (between fits of laughter).

why?

They dont look comfortable...

"Come on, lets take a picture with the aroused seal for our Christmas card!!!"

Ok, the choke hold is an unusual choice, but what I was wondering is how did the mail man get in there?

What the hell?

Loll, get that man a shirt!

Whoa... wtf????

huh?

/s320/Bear+family+1+.JPG>

Omg it's Fred! If you don't know who Fred is, well, more power to you.

Demotivational Poster

2009-07-13T00:29:00.000-07:00

Russian Prison Tattoos - Implied In Ink

2009-07-09T23:20:00.000-07:00

'According to the book of Genesis, God placed a mark on the world's first murderer before sending him into exile. The mark of Cain indelibly branded its bearer as a criminal and social outcast.
It is not known when tattooing first became a common practice in Russian prisons and Stalinist Gulags. Soviet researchers first discovered and studied this underground activity in the 1920s; photographs of prisoners from that period suggest an already elaborate and highly developed subculture. More than simple decoration, the images symbolically proclaim the wearer's background and rank within the complex social system of the jailed.'

Credit for above info, Foolishpeople.com

Somebody recently mentioned Russian prison tattoos to me when on the subject of my tattooed animals blog, so I decided to do a little google work and this is what i've found.

Crucifix- a cross worn on the chest signifies a “Prince of Thieves”, the highest possible rank. Or a scene of the crucified Christ, has no religious meaning but it’s the inmate saying he’s been oppressed and sentenced by the authorities just like Jesus. If the crucifix is topped by a crown then it means the wearer is a pakhan – a leader of a thieves family.

‘Grins’ – these are humorous tattoos usually incorporating a grinning face and are often accompanied by text. The butt of the grin/joke in will often be the prison authorities.

Snakes – a snake around the neck/shoulders mean that the wearer feels that the Soviet/Communist party system still has a hold on them, still adversly affecting their lives.

Tigers – signifies an ‘enforcer’, or a sign of an avenger, geared at times at guards and prison authority.

Cats – the cat is associated with the characteristics needed by a thief (slyness). The most common thief tattoo. Normally tattooed as a pair on the upper chest.

Skulls – these are usually worn by high ranking gang members, interpreted to mean a murderer.

Eyes – Various meanings: if on the upper/middle torso they literally mean that the wearer is keeping their eyes open and it isn’t a derogatory/forced tattoo. If placed on lower backside that is to show that the prisoner is used for sexual gratification. If the eyes are tattooed in the lower groin/hip high area, someone with that tattoo is known as ‘humiliated’ or ‘a Downcast’.

Barbed wire – Often the prison term in years is shown by the number of ‘barbs’ on the wire. (Additional search tells me that barbed wire accross the forhead means life sentence without possibility of parole, as depicted below.)

Swastika/nazi symbols – are a sign of rebellion against Russian prison authority. Doesn’t literally mean that the wearer is a nazi sympathiser. (In some cases, as below, swastikas are done facing the opposite direction. I could not find a meaning to this.)

Stars – stars commonly represent time served; each point indicates a year served in jail or if stars are tattooed on knees it means you bow to no authority.

Double Sig runes – One who does not confess, also tattooed as sign of rebellion to authority, again not usually associated with the Nazi symbol.

Churches – The number of dome towers (cupolas) indicates either number of prison terms or number of years of the sentence.

Setting sun – this tattoo is usually accompanied by birds flying over the horizon. It represents freedom.

Knight or Crusader – a knight in full armor indicates a sadist, an inmate accused of hooliganism, assault and battery. Also indicates prison ‘enforcers’ or tattooed for racist meanings.

Genie – a Genie and a lamp indicate inmates serving time for drug-related crimes.

Spider within a Web – Can indicate a drug addiction. It can also mean that the wearer is a thief. If the spider is shown moving upwards it means the wearer is still an active criminal, if the spider is moving downwards it means that the wearer is intending to leave the thief’s way of life.

(see swastika example)

Dagger – sexual predator or, if the dagger is tattooed on the shoulders with blood dripping form the end of blade, it means you are a killer, a man to be feared or called upon when in need of an accomplice for a murder.

Bells – Literally signifies that the wearer will serve his full given sentence, from “bell call to bell call”. He cannot get parole because he has been convicted of a very serious crime. Shows high ranking and will get respect in prison.

(see stars example)

Candle sticks – wearer is saying he can extinguish your light, beware.

Butterflies – show the wearer is trustworthy, and an escape artist.

Stalin and Lenin faces – considered sacred, so inmates would tattoo the faces over their hearts and vital organs so guards would not hit or shoot them in that spot of the body. Nowadays these tattoos are rarely used.

Sailing Ship – This means that the wearer is willing come along with an escape plan. Anyone planning an escape will know that the wearer will be keen to be a part of it.

Madonna – holding a baby Jesus – wearer has been a thief/criminal from their early days.

Rose – The wearer celebrated a teenage birthday in the zone (prison).

pornographic tattoos – in general these are either grins or forcibily applied because of failure to pay gambling debts or other infractions of the theives code.

‘Finger ring’ tattoos (there is a complex system with many types of ring tattoo). These tattoos may indicate the time served, type of crime or place of imprisonment.

To be continued

Photo bombing (the other kind)

2009-07-07T05:16:00.000-07:00

This picture is so great it deserves a post all of its own.

Amusing graffiti, #2!

2009-07-01T22:50:00.000-07:00

Ah, another round of searching on one of my favorite visual topics, graffiti! Funny, strange, interesting, creepy (offensive?), and sometimes downright brilliant, you name it i've found it somewhere!

Lmao! perfect first pic.

Hehehehehehehe

O_o

A Banksy, easily recognized by the little girl in red, dont in his unique style.

Also a Banksy. Most of you have surely seen this posted somewhere.

Right on, fuck the pro life movement

Nice....

.....

Lol!

Yay!

wow...

A Banksy (duh)

yes.

This was almost surely originally a submission to post secret.

Hells yeah....

Hell ya, i want to do that now....

Real in Russia

2009-07-01T16:20:00.000-07:00

Behold, the ultra strange Russian playground art montage!

Playground in Russia. Seriously.

LMAO, Teletubby Cosmonaut? Also from a russian playground

Again with the playground, apparently the grafiti is nothing nice...

(playground) Dancing bear and angry asian sword bearing ninja man. The wall in the background says "danger zone". lol

(playground) "Hypodermic needles are fun, kids!" Damn thats freaky

(playground) "Play now or DIE!" *insert evil laugh here*

Holy shit, Sasquatch is impoersonating a nurse and appears to have kidnapped a rightfully terrified rabbit!

"Headless statues decorate this playground for children. I am sure equally creepy stone heads decorate the bedrooms of some local teenagers."

To remind the children of the happy "white room days"....

Fuck yes, I want it.

*rolls on the floor in fits of giggles* This one caught me completely off gaurd for some reason!

Dear in the hearts of many children is this fat topless man being strangled by a tree...

LMAO, caught in the act....

Wow, thats cheerfull... I like how alot of the paint seems to have worn off her chest... lol

Picture Perfect, Statue Stupid. #2!

2009-07-01T14:10:00.000-07:00

The world can never have to many weird statues! Did some extra searching and found a few I missed the first time around, enjoy!

Not even Superman gets it right every time... (Berlin, Germany)

Ok.... Remember me mentioning that art is objective??? Perfect example.

EdVenture Children's Museum. Apparently you can climb up inside it

NYC... Next time somebody tells me Californians are weirder than New Yorkers I have a visual argument.

On a road somewhere between Seattle and Boston the Jolly Green Giant surveys the land with a broad creepy smile...

Yo can I get one of those for my yard? Lmao

"Your looking for the brothel? It's right over there, the one with all the shady looking characters... Ya cant miss it." (no, its not really a brothel)

Where is that little girl looking?? jk

Man, can somebody please tell the Jolly Green Giant to stop leaving his stuff all over town? His shoe in the park was bad enough, but this is just getting silly...

Am I mistaken or is the one on the left a man? O_o Either way im confused.

Ok thats 2 over sized thumb statues now... I think im out of the loop on new trends in art???

Is it just me or does that look like a large elephant shaped building in the middle of the ghetto?

I became twice as confused when I noticed what appears to be airport baggage carts in the foreground... I have no clue where this is.

????

Lmao, hell yeah!

Ok, what the hell am I even looking at here?

Wow, little graphic there. Supposedly this is outside wall street, in memory of the 2008 stock market crash.

Random but I like it

Lol

No idea what so ever, where, why, or scale.

Chubby depressed woman fountain??

Change purse statue... Is somebody out there just fuckin with the poor ppl now?

Certainly a creative idea for a mailbox...

What the... are they serious with this???

By far one of the dumbest ones i've seen, and thats saying something!

Loll. Melbourne, Australia

Whoa, what the hell? Trafalgar Square, London, England

"Try not to fall over the naked woman sunk into the ground on your way out!" idk.

One of the less family oriented statues...

Surprise!

Huh????

Car out of beer cans, props for recycling?

'Big Baby', done by Nina Levy (obviously a disturbed woman...), in a park. Not sure where

Man, you could not pay me to sit near that thing, let alone on it. (Shawn insists that I add "thats what she said!". *sighs* Mind out of the gutter Shawny, come on now.)

'Happy' in Chattanooga, Tennessee.

Gah, help! (somewhere in Russia)

San Jose, Costa Rica.

The SLC, Utah. You tell me.

Stockholm, Sweden. Whats with all the manhole lurkers?

Bologna, Italy. Not a rare sight there either!

Traviso, Italy. See previous comment, lol

Fuck yes, dog morphing into a banana?? Thats my guess anyway. I want this one, lol

Oh god, need I say it? Watership Down. This brought me horrific flashbacks to my childhood. I was stupidly allowed to watch the movie as a small child with a pet rabbit. The trauma brought on by that film was severe and long lasting, and to this day images from it and the extensive nightmares that followed are still burned in to my brain. A more recent severe trauma made seeing this 10x more horrible.
This piece was apparently up on ebay for a while. I don't doubt that it sold.

Men. It always ends with a pissing contest.

Where the hell was the artist even going with this, and did he die before he finished or something?? titled 'The Big Giving'....

2009-04-08T21:29:00.000-07:00

The Mugshot Awards!

2009-03-06T11:12:00.000-08:00

Welcome ladies and gentlemen, this afternoon we will be presenting the winners of The Mugshot Awards! Please sit back, relax, and laugh your ass off!

First up we have the award winners for worst mugshot outfits!

It should be.

Is it hot teenage moms that you like? Cause that might be why your in jail.

Or not...

Loll

Next up, worst mugshot hair!

Why oh why?

Thats just dumb.

Vito and his hair helmet, lol!

Next, best mugshot expression!

Holy shit, its Rocky!

Time for best mugshot flair!

This guy was booked for arson, how scary is that? Having your house burned down is bad enough, but having it burned down buy a guy in facepaint is just humiliating.

Relationship Revenge

2008-12-04T23:40:00.000-08:00

Hell hath no fury like a lover betrayed.

Poster reads: "Thank goodness there's Facebook! At least I've discovered you're a traitor pig before the wedding! Signed, your former betrothed bride and the 548 guests of our wedding,"

A very peeved fiancee plastered these poster all over Rome, after finding pictures of her boyfriend (Antonio M.) with his head between another womans breasts...... on his Facebook! What an idiot. *applauds Ms. Valeria A.* Way to show him!
As if putting these up all over the city didnt get the word out effectively enough, this stunt attracted a decent amount of media coverage as well... That and it ended up all over the internet.

Dont Take It Personal

2008-11-18T22:59:00.000-08:00

Personal ads that made me giggle, enjoy!

Thats what you get for going to a bar called "Tiki Bobs".
I want to see the rest of the ad above it O_o

Im told this translates as "You who came home with me on Friday. Not only took my virginity, but also my key to the laundry room. Why? Unnecessary. This relationship lacks communication. /D"

"Young Desperate Man seeks good-looking, intelligent girl with the right shapes. Will also consider an experienced woman. A mature older woman will also do, and in the worst case even a guy. Answer to "Dinner for two?""

??????????

Wedding announcements. These always make me wonder how stupid these people must be not to realize how the announcements will look!

Lol, thats one way to announce a wedding...

Crackpot Creations

2008-11-16T20:03:00.000-08:00

At some point in our lives we all see someone with some sort of ridiculous gadget and wonder why the hell does that even exist? Those dreadful umbrella hats for instance, the kind that are always sold at flea market dollar stalls. For god sakes, WHY?? I wont let my self continue or i'll start ranting. Here are some more ridiculous inventions.

Even funnier than the invention itself is what the person I stole this from wrote. Here is his description word for word.
"Phone fingers are prophylactics for your digits so you don't smudge your precious iPhone screen. They come in small, medium, large and extra large, and you can get a bag of 25 of them for around $15. They are stupid and ugly, like my girlfriend. They also make you look like you've had your hand up your ass. As stupid as they are, I'm still buying a pack of the small (I wish they had extra small) to test as reusable condoms."
Lol!

Tank hummer. Why the fuck....?

Just plain wrong.

Umm, noodle mask? Ever heard of a rubber band?

I defy you to find an anyone who would wear one of these.

Actually I think this one is a pretty good idea, my dog would love this! But it does look silly.

Oh please, they actually expect people to carry that thing?
"Bob do you have a nail file?"
"Yes actually, hold on...." *gets out pocket knife*
*30 minutes later* "Ah, found it! Here Fre- Fred?"

*hits forehead*

"Dude, where do you keep the bread?"
"In the giant rollie pollie thing."
or..
"Now activating CHEESE SHIELD!"

Umm, new age cat bed possibly?

What the... am I seriously seeing a mascara brush on a pocket knife?

Why the hell would people advertise the circumference of their waist? Well, unless the really skinny people wanted to show off. Still, what was the inventor thinking?

Stair drawers??
"Ma, wheres the duct tape?"
"Third stair from the top, dear. Wait, or is it the second from the bottom?"

Does the printer use toilet paper?

"Johnny, you forgot to grab a plate for your cookies"
"Fuck plates, my mug has a cookie shelf, bitch!"

Extreme pez dispenser!!! I want one...

Marketed as a hearing aid. No, I am not kidding.

Really now, is losing the remote that much of an issue that people are willing to velcro it to their head?

Thats right ladies, they expect us to eat soup and rice out of our bras. And just incase you were wondering, the chopsticks are included.

Why does it have a door?

The Face-to-Face tandem bike is the invention of Taiwanese inventor Chen Yugang.
You FAIL, Chen Yugang, like snakes in a two legged race. (yeah i know that analogy was lame, its 5:30 am, what do you want from me?)

~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~?~!~

I have saved the most idiotic for last!
And the award for the dumbest invention EVER goes to....
*drum roll*

Thats right, your eyes do not deceive you, that is indeed a tampon with a spike on it. I know your probly hoping that the idea of this is to disguise a weapon as a tampon so that nobody suspects that your armed, but alas I must correct you on this delusion. This was seriously intended to be used exactly like a tampon. Supposedly it was designed not to hurt the user, but lets be real here, there is no way in hell that could be made safe! Why not just use a regular one? Just the fact that a woman is on her period is enough to put any man off.

Hows My Driving?

2008-11-15T16:59:00.000-08:00

Im sure all of you have misplaced something at numerous times in your life. Your keys, your wallet, your phone, the remote, etc. Thats understandable, even the most organized people lose something small occasionally, so dont worry about it. However, if you have ever misplaced something rather larger and harder to lose than your keys, such as your car or your giant fan, we'll that takes talent(or lack there of?). These accidents will leave you saying, "Well now how the HELL did that get there?"

So thats where I parked...

"Surprise" is exactly the word I was looking for.

Probly just a joke, to lazy to check the source.

Wait, what?

I know the british have tiny cars, but I think they overestimate their abilities sometimes...

We said "12ft 3in"! NOT "12ft 3in oh ok just a little bit more."!

Love is in the air...

Oh sorry, is this a bad time? I'll just go to the store later...

I dont know how people drive where you come from sir, but here the carpool lane is not in the center.

Its hard to conduct a high speed chase when the cement is still drying

Right Back Statue - Picture perfect, statue stupid.

2008-11-15T01:05:00.000-08:00

One thing about art is obvious. Its objective, and not everybody has the same taste. What is not always obvious is what on earth was going through the artists head while they were creating! Here are some statues that made me say, "What the hell?"

"Come on Henry, lets take our wedding photo in front of this giant iguana!"

"Get down from there grandpa, your drunk."

Contrary to popular belief, the Headless Horseman does not ride to his day job. Also contrary to popular belief, he IS a party person. Those headless hangovers are BRUTAL!

Or...

Professor Lupin was dreadfully tired. All he wanted to do was sleep, but he knew he had to get onto platform 9 3/4 and board the Hogwarts express... But he didnt quite make it.

Hey, the Hulk family has to go somewhere on their vacation.

Kid: Mom, Timmy put that cone back on his head.
Mother: Hush, can't you see mommys talking to somebody?
Kid: But mommy he's by the water!
Mother: Shhh!
*splash!*
Kid: Mommy, I dont think Timmy took enough swimming lessons.
Mother: Thats nice honey, be quiet.

"Lets not move next to the docks where the shark poachers are, I said. "I Like to see the sharks lifted off the boats with those cranes! Wouldnt it be funny if one fell?" you said. Yeah Carl, this is HILARIOUS."

Just your run of the mill local park inter species couple statue.

Wife: Charles, are you sure you want to donate this to the museum?
Husband: Yes, their going to put it out front with a plaque with my name on it.
Wife: But doesnt it.... remind you of something....?
Husband: Oh? What should it remind me of?
Wife: Think, Charles... Something you've seen before...?
Husband: Hmm, nope, dont recall. My memory doesnt go back that far.

A monument to homeless dementors everywhere?

What are we in line for again?

"Did I just hear your father? Ohh, this could be awkward..."

"I know its cold out and I appreciate your help, but we're in PUBLIC! And im trying to read..."

Over My Dead Body - A grave assembly.

2008-11-14T23:44:00.000-08:00

Tombstones. Its possible to find humor in even the most grave situations... pun fully intended. Enjoy the amusing tombstones! (With contributions by Brock B. and Shawn E.)

One word for ya. "Holy!"

To bad.

This cant be real.

Stalling For Time - The writings on the stall

2008-11-14T01:29:00.000-08:00

Thats right, im doing an entire entry on bathroom graffiti. In highschool I would wander out of my Study Skills class nearly every day and into the A-Building girls bathroom to answer texts and read the new graffiti. I have a theory that the reason that the graffiti in that bathroom was the best in the school is because 1) girls like to write on stuff & 2) the bathroom was right next to the special education classrooms, where everybody is angsty and has plenty to say. Restroom graffiti artists, thanks for making me laugh/think/stare confusedly and momentarily forget how gross public restrooms are!
Behold the montage!

Umm, go Doug?
Why is "the" underlined?

Whooops...

This one made me burst out laughing and lose my balance off the arm of my chair!

Military bathroom

Military bathroom

Military bathroom

Military bathroom

Thats right, another military bathroom.

Another one

In Philly. Im confused. (maybe they are too?)

"I feel more alone the older I get. It's like the world doesn't believe in loyalty anymore." Its true =(

Lol...

Signs Of Improvement

2008-11-13T22:38:00.000-08:00

While gathering material for my last post I was seeing alot of graffiti on signs, and then suddenly I realized this is a whole new blog post montage just waiting to happen! SIGN GRAFFITI! (i stray from signs a bit, sorry.). So many signs just begging for improvement, so little time to improve them before somebody catches you!!

Not graffiti exactly, but i think it looks cool.

Amusing Graffiti - Double the nonsense, double the fun!

2008-11-13T21:14:00.000-08:00

I myself have no problem with graffiti, no matter how prominent, as long as it is not offensive (i do not consider swearing offensive). I see it as creative, even when its nothing that interests me. On occasion I even see something that makes me stop and say, "Damn, why didnt I think of that?" I personally have nothing to say that I feel is worth scrawling on a public wall. These people felt differently, enjoy!

Thought this was really cool as well as funny

Yesss! I <3 Toaster too!

Vital Signs

2008-11-10T19:08:00.000-08:00

Our world is full of signs, and signs are full of possibilities! I cannot imagine being in charge of changing one on those signs with all the re arrangeable letters and not having a little fun with them. While some of the intentional sign humor is great, some of the best is entirely accidental.
Enjoy!

Excuse me, toilet camera???

Damn, there go my weekend plans.

Smartass skills - Its a hard job but somebodys gotta do it.

2008-11-09T23:34:00.000-08:00

Have you ever been really tempted to give a smartass answer to a question but didnt? These people dont resist temptation as well as you do. Some of these are very hard to read because the pictures wouldnt fit right, arg. Sorry!

Worlds shortest and most honest book report.

Wait for it...

This kid actually got a full score! Look at the rest of the test below
http://officeofstrategicinfluence.com/exam/

Off topic, messed up test question!

What the duck??

Engrish - Please leave your grammar at the door. #2

2008-11-07T16:24:00.000-08:00

More! Theres some random weird products in here too.

For that small fuzzy animal fresh taste...? And the cigarettes you wont want to smoke.

Especially suitable for long-distance driving, DRUNK DRIVING and night driving???

Engrish - Please leave your grammar at the door.

2008-11-07T03:38:00.000-08:00

Amusing random pictures of signs and stuff with english (supposedly) translations (kind of?).

Late night on the discovery channel!

Those cabbage patch kids grow up so fast.

Amusing pictures.

2008-11-07T01:43:00.000-08:00

I feel I must give advance warning at this point. I am including some of those kitten pictures with text added (as well as other pictures). You know, the ones that are totally unavoidable these days if you ever use google image search or read threads, where everything is spelled so so strangely it almost makes you cringe. I often find myself trying to decide whether to laugh or scream or both. The spelling really gets to me after a while... I have heard of this same feeling of conflict from other people, so if anybody who feels that way too is reading this blog and hoping not to see kitten pictures, sorry, enjoy the other ones! Im betting alot of these wont be as funny once i've caught up on my sleep.

Funny T-Shirts

2008-10-19T00:31:00.000-07:00

I found these when I clicked an ad by accident.

Shouldn't that be dyslexics?

Hobo Humor

2008-10-18T00:48:00.000-07:00

Funny/creative hobo signs!

Tattooing Animals - Art or Abomination?

2008-10-17T21:57:00.000-07:00

Todays topic is tattoos. first off, I consider tattoos an art form, and people who go around saying that all tattoos are stupid bother the hell out of me. However I do believe there is a limit, and that limit has been reached. Most of you have probably heard that some people get their pets tattooed, but im betting very few of you have actually seen it. Im not talking about registration tattoos for show animals, but pictures and designs intended to be art.

Tattooed fish at a petstore in Williamsville, NY. Exactly how does one tattoo a fish? Very carefully im guessing. As for why anyone would tattoo a fish, I have no idea.

Sedated pig being tattooed by professionals in Beijing.

Its bad enough that these people tattooed their dog, but come on, could they have picked anything more degrading???

Whoa.... The scariest thing about this picture is that I suddenly want a hairless cat...

And this ones makes me hope i never encounter one... Im torn!

I cant tell which looks more alive, the beard or the dog...

This one is hard to see, but just as crazy as the rest.

Prank calls - All or nothing

2008-10-14T22:10:00.000-07:00

Have you ever answered the phone and heard something like, "Is your refrigerator running? Well you better go catch it!" then alot of giggling and a click? Sure you have. Do you react like most people do and just hang up shaking your head and thinking 'Stupid immature teenagers...' and go on with your day? Or do you hit hit *69 ten minutes later with a smirk on your face thinking 'Amateurs!' ?
If your gonna make prank calls you might as well go all out. This kid is FUNNY!

Lets make fun of the church and see what happens! Bring on the locusts!

2008-10-11T22:42:00.000-07:00

If your very religious, have no sense of humor, or both, turn back now.

Church signs. Funny, confusing, or sometimes drownright atrocious.

Finally, a cult advertisement that gets right to the point!

Did those bastards really just say "homosexual agenda"? I have a few things id like to say to the sick people who are responsible for that one...

Well damn, if its not on google, it either cant be found or isnt worth knowing. (jk)

True, but its so much better!

Im suspicious about this one (and others). I dont think church sign magnets include dollar and cent signs in the set... :P

Excuse me, did you just say "bucket of joy"?

Their trying to trick us!

Thats just in bad taste.

Who?

Photocrashing - An art or an annoyance?

2008-10-09T22:08:00.000-07:00

Have you ever gotten a roll of film developed and found that your pictures didnt turn out quite as expected? Well picture this: You and several of you friends walk into walgreens to pick up the photos you took the week before on your family trip to Hawaii. You open the envelope on the spot, eager to show off the pictures of you and your family standing in front of various landmarks. First picture looks great, as does the second. The third picture looks fine apon first glance, but then something catches your eye. Over your right shoulder, a teenager with a purple mohawk and a less than subtle middle finger appears to be taking a bite out of your grandmother...
Enjoy the montage!

Jake Gyllenhaal is obviously a photocrashing master!

I decided that this was worth adding simply because we are confused by the angry sunburned zombie woman... Sorry lady, but I think its a safe bet that you'd agree that thats not your best picture.

Ah, the classic drunk bite out of a strangers head photocrash.

Possibly one of the best examples of photocrashing EVER!

Is that Gary Coleman in a parka?

Whoa... thats a little scary...

Butt-mugging! Matthew Lillard, you've been outdone!

Is that a real person?? Looks like a wax replica...

I think it's a safe bet that the stuff in the bottle isnt apple juice.

Whaaaat.....?

One step back for the 'gangsta' comunity, one big leap forward for random white guys everywhere

"She dances like THAT??? Oh no, what have i done???"

Even accidental photo crashing can be funny! And disturbing...

Whoa, that is a scary kid... And that girls dress? TERRIFYING!